15 things the vertically enhanced can do better

At almost 5′ 12″ I apparently qualify as a vertically enhanced human and I was reminded of this fact over the weekend by my very observant in-laws. Every single time they see me they inevitability say, “Boy, you are really, really tall”.

My husband’s Aunt also tactfully pointed out that I may have even gotten taller since the last time she’d seen me. Perhaps I was just elongating for primal purposes.

Luckily I was able to come up with 15 things people (like me) can do better than the vertically challenged folks (i.e. my in-laws).

  1. We can see your bald spot.
  2. We can put the star on the Christmas tree.
  3. We can touch Mars when we wear heels.
  4. All our jeans are capri pants.
  5. We can make amazing snow angels.
  6. We can date Mick Jagger.
  7. We can wear drag queen shoes.
  8. We can make big foot tracks.
  9. The air is better up here.
  10. We don’t need a step stool to get in our SUV.
  11. We can reach the pedal.
  12. We can drive with our head sticking out of the sunroof.
  13. That top shelf? Not a problem, ever.
  14. Playing keep away is fun and ridiculously easy.
  15. We can out walk our in-laws. Eat our dust…

And yes, next year I expect that my height will remain stable.