If Severus Snape Shopped At Lush…

I happen to be a huge fan of Severus Snape and Lush and Harry Potter. Did I mention I’m a Harry Potter fanatic?

Anyway, last Fall I did a If Lucius Malfoy Shopped At Lush… post for fun as I wasn’t quite sure Professor Snape would wander into Lush. But I’ve since changed my mind. I can actually see Severus sneaking along the soap wall, Lush basket in hand with a sour smirk on his face trying not to be noticed.

While Lucius was all about shampooing those blond locks, I think Severus would be more appreciative of the herbal benefits of Lush. So my first pick for Severus Snape is going to be…

Lush Aqua Marina Cleanser

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Ironically Aqua Marina this is not one of my favorite scents, it was just a bit too strong for my nose but I imagine that Severus would be enthralled by the “mineral-rich nori seaweed”. In fact this looks like something you might find in the potions closet and he probably needs a good cleansing kaolin clay being that he’s in the dirty dungeon for a good deal of his classes.

Lush Sea Vegetable Soap

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I really don’t really think that Severus wants to smell like luscious lavender but Sea Vegetable? Yes indeed. Unbeknownst to him he might even elicit a passing smile from the ladies at Hogwarts from this ocean scented delight.

“The Comforter” Bubble Bar

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I’m going to make a grand assumption here and possibly mess with the Harry Potter canon by thinking that just maybe Severus Snape enjoys a good bubble bath after berating students and plotting with (and against) the Dark Lord all day. The Comforter Bubble Bar has got blackcurrant and citrus to wash away the grime and relax even the most jaded resident of Hogwarts.

Lush Shine So Bright

Lush Shine So Bright Split End Treatment Review

While the Harry Potter books allude to Professor Snape being a greasy haired git, we all know better. Severus just has very misunderstood hair and I’m sure a little Shine So Bright would rev up those black tresses so they shine like a raven.

Secret Arts (formally Dark Arts) Jelly Bomb

This Jelly Bomb screams Severus Snape and being that it used to be called Dark Arts I’m wondering if it was inspired by him. Now it’s just called Secret Arts and it still screams Severus Snape. I  believe that Professor Snape would love Brazilian orange oil, Cinnamon Leaf Oil and Sweet Almond essential oil that makes up this unique formula.

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I also think that Severus might even ask for a few free samples at the counter. After all, he’s not as wealthy as Lucious and who in their right mind would turn down a free sample pot of Hair Custard.

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I do believe he’d nick a tub of Dark Angels from Lucius too!

Also be sure to check out my Lush Dark Angels Review on YouTube!

If Lucius Malfoy Shopped At Lush…

Around Halloween Harry Potter is on constant loop around my house and I can’t help but think that Lush would be an amazing addition to Diagon Alley or Hogsmeade. So just for fun I got to thinking about which Harry Potter character would most likely be lurking in the aisles of Lush and while Severus Snape is one of my favorite characters I doubt his ego would allow him a trip to a bath store…Lucius Malfoy on the other hand…oh yeah.

Lucius has the Galleons and the gall to pull off a major Lush haul that would make most of us green with envy. So here goes…

Jumping Juniper Shampoo Bar

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I’m pretty sure that Lucius has a secret weapon for keeping those blond locks looking amazing so he must be using the Jumping Juniper Shampoo Bar. This lavender and rosemary duo is surely what gives those famous blonde locks their shine. Clearly Azkaban didn’t supply him with any Lush products because his hair took a major turn for the worse after his imprisonment. The dangers of being a Death Eater…bad hair.

Dark Angels Face and Body Cleanser

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After a day at Hogwarts berating Harry Potter ones skin is sure to get a bit grungy. The castle is dark, dirty and fueled by fireplaces so there’s got to be a lot of soot in the air. However that’s not a problem if you’ve got a supply of Dark Angels Face and Body Cleanser to blast off that castle grim. This black as night coal cleanser is sure to clean up Mr. Malfoy’s delicate skin and it gets bonus points for matching his wizard robes.

Guardian of the Forest Bath Bomb

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When you’re a former Slytherin green is in your DNA. Lucius probably has a closet full of Guardian of the Forest Bath Bombs hidden away at Malfoy Manor and a bath tub the size of a swimming pool to use them in. And if I’m going to guess I image that Lucius smells of Cypress Oil which coincidentally is the main ingredient in this bath bomb. Oh and yes I’m pretty sure Lucius is a bath kind of guy.

Magic Wand Soap

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Would Lucius go the obvious route and use a soap called Magic Wand? Does an owl fly? Any man that conceals his wand in a cane is going to go ga ga over a soap that leaves him “bewitchingly bright”. Not that we’d mind smelling him after a shower with Magic Wand in the mix.

So there you have it. Four products that I’m pretty sure Lucius Malfoy would stock up on at Lush and you can bet your sweet Cauldron Cake’s that he’d even buy some Charity Pot at the register.

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Image Credit: Harry Potter Wiki

Be A Harry Potter Slytherin Witch For Halloween!

There is a lot going on in the Harry Potter fandom world including these Harry Potter Make-Up Brushes that just look so cool. So being an insanely obsessed Harry Potter fan I thought I’d share what make-up I’d wear if I was a witch in Slytherin House. What?!? No Gryffindor you may ask? Alas, as much as I love Hermione, Harry and Ron I’m on Team Snape.

So here’s a little Slytherin House inspired make-up to inspire you for Halloween!

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The Color Palette…

I wanted to use colors that represented Slytherin House like green but I also wanted to capture the essence of witches and wizards so I used a lot of purple, gold and red. The rust felt like a potion color for me so I added that in too.

The Eyes…

I spent the most time on my eyes because I wanted to go super dramatic. Don’t be afraid to get dark on your eyes, think stage make-up for Halloween.

While using just green might be the obvious choice for Slytherin eyeshadow I wanted to go dark so I used a combo of the Urban Decay Shadow Box Palette and the Kat Von D Shade + Light Contour Quads in Rust. The Kat Von D case reminds me so much of Harry Potter, it is gorgeous!

I went super dark on my eyes using the purple, green and dark brown from Urban Decay and Kat Von D. I also added a little Lilac Lust from the Maybelline Color Tattoo Crayon. I highlighted with the white shade from the Shade + Light palette to give myself a ghostly effect.

I also went dark with my eyeliner and mascara. I used a Smashbox Kohl eyeliner because I felt like the crayon was more true to Harry Potter than a liquid. I used Urban Decay Perversion for my mascara. Up close and in person it looked dark but very witchy!

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The Lips…

I choose the Borghese B Lip Gloss in Shimmer Berry because it looks a bit like a red shiny apple, with a shimmery shine of course!

The Face…

I use my NYX Bright Idea Illuminating Stick to give a little all over gold magic shimmer to my face. Very appropriate for walking the halls of Hogwarts.

The Nails…

I used the SinfulColors Nail Polish in Rich in Heart because it’s a beautiful blackish red. Perfect for holding a quill pen in Snape’s potion class.

I topped it off with a purple witch hat and a black jacket. The look took me about 45 minutes to complete and it’s a great way to give homage to Harry Potter and Slytherin House while handing out candy on Halloween. Once the kids are gone you can eat the left over candy and watch The Half-Blood Prince.

 

I’ve Got Dr. Who Nails!

Ok, I decided to do something fun today with my daughter as we’re both huge Dr. Who fans. David Tennant is our all time favorite Dr. and we love the Tardis so I ordered some nail decals from Boston Nail Art and used nail polish that I already had on hand.

I am a total geek at heart and projects like this are so much fun for me.

How our Dr. Who nails turned out!

The Decals – I paid $4.00 + free shipping for the decals from Boston Nail Art. You get 50 decals with 3 different designs. 20 “Doctor Who” lettering decals, 20 Tardis decals and 10 Dr. Who Tardis logo decals.

You get detailed instructions with the decal package. First you polish with a light color. Next up you soak the decals in water for 15 seconds to remove the paper from the plastic so that you can cut them to the correct size and apply to your nails. Finally you add a clear top coat.

It was super simple to remove the paper from the decal with water and I found that cutting them was really easy too. The decals do not have adhesive so you need to place them on your nail while they are wet.

The Polish – I used Sinful Colors in Midnight Blue, Ulta in Bam-Blue-Zled and a no name clear coat that I’ve had for awhile.

First up I polished my nails with Midnight Blue on my thumb and pinkie nail. This color is gorgeous, covers in one coat and looks like Tardis blue. I painted my remaining 3 nails with the Bam-Blue-Zled and applied the decals. Finally I applied the clear coat. The only odd thing I noticed was that the ink on the decals seems to smudge in a few spots and that when the top coat dried I could see the plastic edges so I touched up a few areas with the Bam-Blue-Zled.

My thought is that my clear coat might have been too old or that I should have used a thicker bottom color. The Bam-Blue-Zled was pretty thin.

Overall I think the look is pretty cool and we’re now ready for a Dr. Who marathon!

I never worried about David Bowie

Back in 1981 I was a pretty uncool 11-year-old who wore floods and a “Gong Show Reject” t-shirt, but that was also the year I got an equally uncool (by today’s standards) AM/FM radio on which I discovered music. I spent my Summer listening to radio hits like “Jessie’s Girl” and “Queen Of Hearts” and “Celebration” over and over and over.

By the time I was 13 I had become addicted to MTV and buying vinyl records. One of my very first purchases was Scary Monsters (and Super Creeps) and “Ashes to Ashes” became my new favorite song. Having grown up in the suburbs I was enthralled by David Bowie’s utter weirdness, listening to him made me feel cool and artsy and unique.

However I was at an age where David Bowie became more sophisticated than my current 14-year-old taste in music and while he was a backdrop for my teens I started to head towards younger groups like Duran Duran. But I never stopped being a David Bowie fan, he was always there…like Lou Reed and Iggy Pop and Tina Turner. I remember when “Modern Love” played hourly on MTV we’d remark on how great he looked and sounded for being “older” at 39 which of course is laughable now that I’m 45. But in reality David Bowie never did age, he looked amazing at 69 and his spirit was equally youthful.

I never worried about David Bowie or thought that he was looking frail as the years passed. He was vibrant, a shining star among the aging rock royalty. So today when I got online I was stunned (as was the world) that someone like David Bowie could vanish over night.

But I suspect in the end that’s what David Bowie wanted and rather than seeing him in pain, I will remember him singing and dancing and being David Bowie.

I don’t know where I’m going from here, but I promise it won’t be boring. -David Bowie

The Chocolate Pen Is The Devil

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We just got done using the Candy Craft Chocolate Pen and my, oh my what an adventure. I am beyond flummoxed on how this little devil got a high rating on Amazon.

I got this device for my daughter for her birthday and today we had a chance to try it out. Yikes. 3 hours later and we’ve got pink goop in our hair, pink goop on the dog and I’m going to need a jack hammer to clean the kitchen floor.

I am horrified that this thing even made it to market. It simply does not work. Not only does it not work but it will drive you mad in the process of not working. Either that or I am the most dim witted person on the planet because after 3 hours of hard work we ended up with a pile of muck.

First the clip that holds the tip on does not clip. OK, it clips after you monkey with it for an hour. Second the “frosting” doesn’t come out unless your heat it up to a zillion degrees, then it comes out in a volcanic burst. Third, the “frosting” doesn’t even come close to popping out of the molds, it just kinda flakes out in little pieces. Ugh.

The above photo depicts the candy that turned out good, I can’t even show the rejects, too scary.

So do yourself a favor and just buy your kid a pastry bag and some frosting, it’ll be much more fun and  a lot less messy.

If you don’t believe me, listen to  Bunny.

15 things the vertically enhanced can do better

At almost 5′ 12″ I apparently qualify as a vertically enhanced human and I was reminded of this fact over the weekend by my very observant in-laws. Every single time they see me they inevitability say, “Boy, you are really, really tall”.

My husband’s Aunt also tactfully pointed out that I may have even gotten taller since the last time she’d seen me. Perhaps I was just elongating for primal purposes.

Luckily I was able to come up with 15 things people (like me) can do better than the vertically challenged folks (i.e. my in-laws).

  1. We can see your bald spot.
  2. We can put the star on the Christmas tree.
  3. We can touch Mars when we wear heels.
  4. All our jeans are capri pants.
  5. We can make amazing snow angels.
  6. We can date Mick Jagger.
  7. We can wear drag queen shoes.
  8. We can make big foot tracks.
  9. The air is better up here.
  10. We don’t need a step stool to get in our SUV.
  11. We can reach the pedal.
  12. We can drive with our head sticking out of the sunroof.
  13. That top shelf? Not a problem, ever.
  14. Playing keep away is fun and ridiculously easy.
  15. We can out walk our in-laws. Eat our dust…

And yes, next year I expect that my height will remain stable.

How to have a Happy Thanksgiving without throwing anyone out the window

If you’re not one of those perky, perfect Wal-Mart pioneer woman commercial families (and who is?) than follow me. I’ve got some real world advice for handling Thanksgiving dinner with the relatives that won’t leave you crying, jumping out the window or heading for the liquor store.

Check out my Thanksgiving Family Dinner Solutions for the real world.

If this happens: Little Joey show up blowing green bubbles out of his nose and hacking up a lung. i.e. Sickness has invaded your home.

Solution: After years of having the walking dead show up at my house for Thanksgiving dinner I enacted “Code Green”. If someone enters my home with an illness I whisper “Activate Code Green for Joey” which means…

  1. Don’t touch the sick kid.
  2. Don’t touch anyone else who has touched the sick kid.
  3. Don’t go within a 2.4 foot radius of the sick kid.
  4. Don’t share food, toys, furniture or the dog with the sick kid.
  5. Don’t look the sick kid in the eye (he might approach you).

This actually works pretty good in years past. Lastly, don’t worry about offending anyone with “Code Green”. Better safe than sick.

If this happens: A mean person shows up.

Solution: Mean people suck and they come in all forms…the nasty sister-in-law, the angry spouse, the disgruntled Uncle…you know who I’m talking about, we all have them. Here’s what I do. It’s very subtle!

Blast a little Bruno Mars on the sound system. Not only a catchy tune and but the lyrics are pretty straight forward and will make you feel better about said nasty person. The cool part about this solution is that you’ll feel better walking around singing this song in your head and the nasty one won’t be the wiser! Or better yet loop the video on the TV!

If this happens: Aunt Sally tries to get you to man the kid table. Why there has to be a responsible adult at the kid table is beyond me. I mean so what if they make a mess? Also sitting at the kid table violates Code Green, “Don’t go within a 2.4 foot radius of the sick kid”. So whatever you do don’t get suckered in to sitting at the kid table.

Solution: This involves math. Under no circumstances do you put an extra chair at the kid table. Smash those little buggers in like sardines. This way no adult can be seated at said table. If Aunt Sally insists take away her big people chair and let her share a seat with the sick kid. That’ll teach her to butt in.

If this happens: People won’t leave! You slave away for hours making dinner and all you want to do after enduring hours with the family is get in bed, watch Harry Potter and eat Jelly Belly’s.

Solution: Fein illness. Nothing clears a crowd faster than some fake vomiting. Go in the bathroom. Make some retching noises and look clammy when you come out. Voila! Room cleared. Commence Harry Potter marathon.

I hope these simple tips help others in need.

May The Force Be With You!

Basement banishment and a broken toe

Ok, raise your hand if you have a basement.

OK, raise your hand if your basement is unfinished and essentially a spider habitat.

Last one, raise your hand if your mother won’t let anything back up from the basement after it’s been banished there.

If you raised your hand to all three, welcome to my world.

This is actually a funny story. As many of you know my mom lives with me and she’s got this old world notion that once something (especially a kitchen something) has been in the basement it’s banished there for life. A couple of years ago I bought a really nice stainless steel wok with a very heavy plexiglass lid. It worked great but took up a ton of room in the kitchen so one day I figured I’d move it into the basement for storage.

Fast forward like three months.

ME: Who wants woked (is that a word) vegetables?

MOM: You’re not bringing that wok back upstairs.

ME: Why not?

MOM: It’s been in the basement.

ME: So, I’ll wash it.

MOM: No.

ME: Why not?

MOM: It’s been in the basement, it’s probably covered in spider webs.

OK, and so the wok stayed in the basement.

No biggie, I can get my woked veggies elsewhere.

Except…

I refuse to actually get rid said wok, instead it moves precariously throughout the basement as I rearrange crap. Well today I did a huge clean up, carried a ton of stuff into the basement and wouldn’t you know the dang wok lid (which weighs about 17 lbs) fell off the shelf and cracked my toe.

The good news…no one (except Toby) really gives a hoot about a toe so I bandaged it up and put on a stiff shoe, problem solved.

Alas my poor wok is still banished to the basement.

Who are Eagles of Death Metal?

In the early reports of terrorism at the Bataclan in Paris I wondered who was playing when tragedy hit. It turns out Eagles of Death Metal were on stage and despite their name they are not a death meal band.

“In fact, the group, from Palm Desert, Calif., mixes driving blues-rock of 1970s vintage with a heavy dose of humor. For fans of Eagles of Death Metal, the band’s name is part of its irreverent charm”. -The New York Times

You can read more about the band in The New York Times. Thankfully no one in the band was hurt or killed physically but I am sure the psychological wounds will run deep.

Thinking about everyone in Paris and the world today.